Life has been a giant roller coaster lately. Yesterday was a really good day, and today started out fine but ended up taking a turn for the not-so-great. When I take a second to reflect on why today ended on such a different note, I can pretty much trace it back to one thing. For some reason I have a really hard time letting go.
I have a hard time letting go of battles that aren't worth fighting. I have a hard time letting go when I lose someone or something I hold dear. I have a hard time letting go when things won't go my way. I have a hard time letting go when I know it's time to let go, and a hard time letting go when I know the end is inevitable.
RRRRGGG!!! I feel like I've been forced to let go of a lot of things lately, more so than usual, and perhaps that's why I find myself on this crazy emotional roller coaster. The weird part is, I don't remember ever thinking I struggled with letting go. It almost feels like I woke up one day and "bam" it became an issue. But, maybe what really happened is that I woke up one day and opened my eyes to reality as an adult.
As I watch the people I respect most navigate through life, I've noticed that there is definitely an art to knowing when to hold on for dear life and knowing when to let go in order to embrace life. From my observations, it seems that the better one gets at deciphering when to say "when," the better off that person is.
"Lord, please grant me the wisdom to know when to hold on, when to let go, and the strength and grace to do both well."
4 comments:
Nice post. That's why I come over here. You ponder well.
I've found a question that helps me decipher the importance of things: "Is this mountain worth dying on?"
Usually it's not, and I let go. I've also learned to turn and walk slowly away from drama when I have the chance. That helps me too.
I think part of your dilemma comes from caring. If you didn't care so much, things would be easier to ignore.
Hmmm... but caring is an asset too. Maybe you're back to your post on balance? ;-)
"Willy: Figure it out. Work a lifetime to pay off a house. You finally own it, and there's nobody to live in it.
Linda: Well dear, life is casting off. It's always that way.
Willy: No, no, some people--some people accomplish something...." (Death of a Salesman Act 1, opening scene)
Linda was a very wise woman, if abused. Willy could never accept life as it was. Miller taught us a lot with this one. Still, seems to me letting go remains one of the great challenges of being totally human.
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Yes, I recognized the participation in class. Great blog!
Sorry, didn't mean to have to delete my comment but I made a spelling error!
I've been trying to think if I had anything I could add to this...but I don't. I probably let go far too easily. 'Out of sight, out of mind' is sadly all too true for me.
But I have noticed that there seem to be those few people who never stay...who are so amazing and are only with me for a very brief time. I don't know why they always have to go.
Okay, that wasn't uplifting, but it felt good to say. ;-)
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